burns..

Slept at 7pm...meant to be a short nap which turned out to be 2 hours nap...then decided to just continue on sleeping then...woke up at 3am....eat and did all the random stuff and now blogging again...

I played football again after church last sunday. Out of 10people, 7 were doctors....wahman...WL(Plastic surgeon), Vincent (going to do something on liver), Ken wu(kidney), Najib, Taufid, me(haha...not yet...), Paul(future cardio)

Sticking with doctors have its pros....when Benjamin started to have blisters on his hand (well, had no idea what he did till he had hot oil splattered on his arm), he suddenly called Jean while playing football 2 sundays ago asking her what to do with the blisters. He said he had 14 blisters on his arm.. he had no idea what to do with them..

He said he put colgate on them...and WL went "what...that is like the least u shud do...becuz colgate makes the wound hurts even more...''

I didn't know that...Even then, I would not be so stupid to do that also...haha...I heard of putting colgate on burns but I think it's a myth becuz colgate doesn't help with the healing...

WL then made fun of Ben (LOLS....so bad...ahhaha)...he said that unless Ben intends to 'brush' his burn after putting on colgate....HAHAH....(as in brushing teeth)...hahaha...

Anyway, they recommended running under cold water...but then realised that Ben burnt his arm the day before...and therefore blisters the day after....

So...they said that he should pop the blisters (of course with sterilised stuff) and then apply medicine...and wrap it up....to prevent infection.

Anyways...
I guessed Vincent went to see Ben after football but seemed stuck himself...and called WL to make sure that he was doing the right thing....cuz WL is the expert in burns....plastic surgeon mar...does skin grafts and all...

Oopss..feeling sleepy again...going back to bed...

signing off..
4.30am

Nothing to blog about..

It a surprising fact that my fishes are still well and alive though I have not changed the water for a month??? Haha...the water is still so surprisingly CLEAR!
Sometimes, I even forgot to feed the fishes for 2 days....still they are alive...haha..sounds as if I am trying to kill them....hmm..

Nothing to blog....lols...WL is going to attend some british people wedding ceremony today...so no football for today...sigh...

Wahlau..really nothing to blog...

signing off..
12.10pm

cell outing again...

Today,

I vaguely heard Ken talking to Serene in my sleep...they were talking about something WL..something like going to White Rose Centre..
Then I heard 12.30pm...

Then Ken went to work...

At 11.30am, Ken suddenly phoned me and told me to get ready...
He said that WL will be coming to fetch at 12.30pm..so wait at parkinson steps...

We went to White Rose Centre in Leeds as a cell...a shopping centre for those who dun know...It was pretty big...probably three times smaller than midvalley...but considered big..

We went to sainsburys in WRC...lols.....of all places...haha....
The things there were surprisingly cheap! They seemed to be in a rush...duh! No...It seems to be WL only who is in a rush to get out of WRC...it is well-known that WL doesn't like shopping...
So, I managed to grab eggs!! sounds crazy I know...haha...15 for 1pound! so cheap! Morrisons sells 18 for 1.64pounds...

So I grabbed 30!

Haha....the things there are so incredibly cheap esp those on offer...I want to go back there again but that means that I will have to take bus number 2...(just in case I forget...then I can reflect what I wrote on my blog...haha)...

Incredibly...after WRC....

We unexpectedly had a change of plans....ended up in Roundhay Park...LOLS...

Roundhay park is amazingly huge...and beautiful...
My first time there...
And we had a great time of sharing...well, I guessed most of the time I was talking....non-stop...ahhaha..
Then, we stopped by lakeland...a restaurant?? Dunno wat it's called...but yea...Jean treated me to Chocolate milkshake....wahman...there goes my diet....plunging...haha...I c myself back to my fat state soon...

A chocolate milkshake...how long will it take for me to burn off the extra calories...

anyway,

I hope that the hiking next saturday will materialise!

hehe...
and I am getting my 30pounds this monday!! Woohoo...for the OSCE presentation thingy....
Godfrey (the statistician of medical school) sent me an email telling me that my presentation was very good and that it was given a straight pass by the China representatives...also he said that how much he appreciated my effort put into the presentation...*blush*

oh ya...we have to take statistic as one of our modules in our second year...duh! And I had been thinking....Godfrey is the statistician of medical school....dun tell me.....that he will be teaching us statistics in our second year!!!

Wahman....haha

Well...he is a nice guy...pretty ok...except that he is pretty weird that at times...eg...he asked me a question..and when I answered him, he said nothing...and seemed to be staring blankly into space....hmmm...

Anyway...it was great volunteering myself anyway....get to know the dean of medical school and the statistician as well...hahah
and feel how OSCE is like!
can still remember the script in my head! hahah....+ the OSCE DVD that I viewed is an examiner training OSCE video....wahman...haha...so I know how OSCE is marked??

But not much was revealed in the DVD anyway...haha..

Going to cook my porridge which will last for the next 3 days.

signing off...
8.25pm

blogging3

Si sushi wants to hire chefs...but they dun wan female!!!!!!!!!!! Reason: cuz females does work very slowly!!! But I am different!!! Grrrr...

Still am in the process of bugging TW n hopefully Alex to get me in...even though a trial...
TW said tat they are discussing about 'firing' a waitress...so hopefully...hahahah....I can get in...HOPEFULLY....

Anyway, I managed to get hold of the book (250 cases in clinical medicine) that Chin Tuan (eye surgeon who just moved to Plymouth) recommended me to read....for my MRCP....still far...LOLSS...what am I doing...but yea...am copying the book..ahem...becuz printing and photocopying is too ex....so copy by hand...maybe when cannot stand it then I type...actually typing is faster....hmm...

Well...the book is a good book...haha...

TW asked Paul to go hiking next saturday....so I shun4 bian4 asked Paul if I can come along..ahha....cuz Paul is driving..so why not...hehe...then get free ride go hiking somewhere in the Yorkshire Dales.....exercise...unfortunately, hiking...I have no stamina....last time I went to Malham, I was the first to give up...lols...halfway up the mountain, my lungs couldn't take it anymore...
Dunno why is it always have to be me who is short of breath....my legs can resist but my lungs refused to co-operate...

So have to rest halfway up the mountain...ahahhaha....

Better than nothing....the view is nice...so worth the climb..

Anyway,

goin to sleep....for some reason, my right leg feels so suan1....

signing off...
12am

sigh...

I applied for the joblink events team member job....hopefully I will get it...sigh..

TW got a job at si sushi...so lucky....Alex helped introduced him in....
Si sushi and yo sushi are two different sushi shops...just in case people reading my blog gets confused. The one I WAS supposed to work in was Yo sushi...
Unfortunately, Yo sushi are trying to cut cost at the moment so I have to wait till Valerie comes back in a week time before she sees Yo sushi condition....and whether I can still work for the remaining one month summer break I have left.

But one thing I am sure of is that in my second year summer hols, I can have a summer job lasting for 8 weeks. The job tat Jean did in her second year hols...something to do with statistics. She said that it's pretty easy to get it...and the pay is ok...1200pounds around there...
That job is only meant for second year medics onwards...so me first year nia...not eligible..sigh....first year...so limited....nobody wants a first year to work with them...most employers want mature students....sigh..

so sien..

I cannot work in si sushi because they only want to employ guy chefs....I am not a guy...sigh....a disadvantage being female....
Hopefully God will give me some random job before term starts and hell begins...

Have seen second year's work pile....LOLSSS....so tough...the brain and all in the first term of second year...tough work man...

Maybe I should read my embryology a bit cuz my foundation in embryology really terrible...

Anyway,

signing off..
12am..
sleep...

the heavenly man

I finally finished reading The Heavenly Man in less than 10 hours.

It has been an inspiring book...with many lessons and 'teachings'...

God has done so much in Bro Yun's life...so many miracles...so many healings...and emphasises how important it is to read God's word + to pray.

The book kor gave me ''captivating'' was only read halfway...hope to finish it soon.

I always see Ken and Serene + TW watching TV...
After 'training' for 3 years without TV, I can survive without one...the thing is that I do not like to watch the TV anymore...Sitting in front of the TV makes me feel uneasy and pointless...
It's like watching a whole load of rubbish other than watching the weather forecast and news of course...

Normally, Ken and serene would cook with the TV on regardless they are watching or not. Then, they will eat watching the TV for a long time...go back to their rooms and continue watching TV....lols...

Me ler...I cook fast...I have a habit of not spending too much time in the kitchen + toilet...which reminded me of TW's friend who came here to take a bath when her shower broke down...wahman...all I heard was the shower running for 50 minutes and I nearly wanted to go and check to see if there is something wrong in the shower....lols....terrible....How can people spend such LONG TIME in the shower???

TV....TW will switch on the TV for no apparent reason and not watching it...lolsss....

I prefer to go online...haha....and do some other stuff rather than rotting away in front of the TV / watching movies...
even the whole load of movies that TW has burned into cds are still on my table....I simply cannot bring myself to watch them...unless someone forced me to...hahaha....that's gonna be a hell lot of time wasted sitting in front of the laptop watching stuff....

anyway,

sleep...

signing off..
12.50am

diet and football

My diet was ok today...

Skipped lunch...and breakfast...ahaha...usually I eat lunch...but today, I 'tied' my stomach...drink water only...

Dinner, I ate the leftover curry yesterday and fried the rice that was given by Melati City.

The thing is that I am so surprised at how my appetite has shrunk...I ate only half the plate and I started feeling guilty. So I gave half the plate of fried rice and half of the chicken curry to TW...
I am cutting down on rice...not eating more than half a plate. I am eating oats in the afternoon...dinner...vege and chicken...haha...oh ya...and the leftover rice...still have to fry them for the next 2 days.

Rice is the fattening food...lols...so cutting down on rice would not caused any deficiency in any minerals...hehe....give all to TW....make him fat...he so thin...

I desire to see myself back to the normal 55kg...

I missed the time I entered college...and Esther's friends were saying how thin I was...thin as in slim...now I am a fat FAT PIG.....
Well, looks like that Esther is thin and I am fat....the opposite has occurred!!! It used to be Esther who was overweight...now it's my turn to get fat and also LOSE WEIGHT!!!!

I WILL LOSE ALL MY EXTRA WEIGHT BY THE END OF DECEMBER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Losing 10kg in 2 months is risky and not good. so a 5 months interval is more 'safe'...now 67kg.....I HAVE TO BE 57KG by the end of december!!!!!!!!

Why I WANT to lose weight....so that I can wear all my clothes again...I was so shocked when I could not ahem....zip up the long pants that I bought in KL last time. I could wear it before I came to UK...now I cannot....so I MUST LOSE WEIGHT....

I am also pretty surprised at my ability to control temptations lately....Jean was 'persuading' me to go watch movie...but I keep saying no...cuz ermm...and lots of excuse came blurting out....

I am trying hard to control everything that has gone haywire for the past few months..hopefully...everything will be back to normal again when Janice comes...
Well, I think when Janice comes, the diet will be more effective cuz Janice can help me finish all the food....

Now, I am fat becuz it is so SO HARD to cook a person's portion.

I always end up eating two people's portion.

Football every sunday until summer ends...I love football....ahhaha...
especially blocking and kicking the ball out of David and TW's way....hahha...

Yesterday's football, I managed to kick the ball out of David and TW's way (both of them were in the same team) thrice...They were ahemm...surprisingly running towards each other...David with the ball...David was yelling at TW to keep me out of the way....before they knew it, HAHHAHA...the ball was kicked away by me....
Then David went :''HAIYO...TW....I told you to keep stephanie out of my way already loh....''

HAHHAA...

The other incident was when...I managed to kick the ball away...and David went ''wahman....''

The third incident was when I kicked the ball, David went:''wahman....How come got something black flew past...so scary...(cuz I was wearing black that day)...

Hahahha...David very funny and cute la....haha....all the comments he made so funny....also he is not that hmm.....'swift' compared to others...so it was 'easier' for me to 'attack' him and get the ball away....TW is also easier to tackle....

Anyway,

My leg feeling itchy now....seems like there are mosquitoes around...though I cannot see any...hmmmm

signing off...
10pm

blogging2

grrr....I cannot sign into Yahoo mail...idiot...

Today went to church...sigh...

Once again...I feel tat not having Andrew around is so different.

We sang the song 'In Christ'....Nobody jumped when we sung the part 'in christ we have everything.' Last time, I have Andrew to jump with me....now jumping alone is so damn weird and so, I didn't jump all because I was self-conscious.

Even the song 'one way' was sung so damn unlively....sigh...

Anyway, I have gotten the new Hillsong cd from Vincent. Hehe....

Most of the songs are nice...some are not...

Ahem...Kyle has noticed that I have been avoiding him...
Whenever he signs into msn, I will appear offline instantly...I dunno why..but talking to him just gives me the feeling of so sien....
sigh...
He asked me whether I want to meet him tomoro since he is coming down to Leeds. I said 'erm...I need to do something...'
He replied instantly :'are you avoiding me?'
Wahman...I was shocked...I didn't expected such a straightforward question.

So I gave a hell lot of excuse like 'I am in a reserve mode in the moment.'

Which is partly true and not.

True becuz it's the end of the month and it's time for ahem....anyway...

partly not true becuz I actually have the intention of avoiding him. lols....I just don't feel like talking to him at the moment...dunno why...but it's just the sien feeling....

Today after football, had dinner with Ken, ser, TW, WL and Jean. Well, before the dinner, on our way home from football, WL 's car broke down in the middle of the road...LOLS...u know why????? Cuz he didn't pump petrol and so the car can no longer move anymore....haha....so stranded on the road till Vincent came to help. Went to buy some petrol...enuf for WL to drive to a petrol station and pump to full tank...

haha...

Dinner was cool....we all cooked a dish...Then, we all talked till late...11.30pm...shared quite a lot of things...and hahhaha...we also mentioned about kor in the middle of the conversation...something about ahem....hahahah...his voice and encounter weekend..something about all the pent-up words he wanted to say......it was quite funny...but I am too tired to recall wat was said....

It was funny anyway...ahhahaha

The dinner was a last minute thing...WL didn't cook..haha..he ordered take-away and bought sprite...jean made sushi...yum yum....serene and Ken cooked something which I cannot recall...something to do with potatoes and stuff...TW cooked kangkung and beef...me ler...chicken curry...

If my heart has grown cold,
There your love will unfold,
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand.
When I'm blind to my way,
There Your spirit will pray
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand.

Oceans will part,
nations come.
At the whisper of Your call.
Hope will rise,
Glory shown,
In my life Your will me done.

Present suffering may pass,
Lord Your mercy will last,
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand.
And my heart will find praise,
I'll delight in Your way,
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand.

Jesus open my eyes to the work of Your hand.

signing off...
1.15am

haihh...

Staying with Val is exactly like the experience of staying with my cousin when we were in KL.

Now Val is on europe tour. So I do not fear of her coming peeping at what I am typing here. Somehow, she is quite kaypoh when she sees me writing my blog. Pretending to talk to me right behind my laptop and peeping quite obviously at my blog.

Lols...

Val has a character which is like a photocopy of my cousin. My cousin loves to wear 'sexy' clothes. Tubes and all...fashion....straightening/curling hair...flirt!....Shopping for clothes....staying in a place for a very long time (for eg...Yo sushi...)

Basically everything is almost the same...literally the same...which may explains why I can get used to Val staying with me. Cuz she is like my cousin and I lived with her for one and a half years in our hot swelting room in KL.

Even though their characters are not the very 'nice' ones, they have kind hearts.

Val and my cousin are almost the same....they like to take my things without asking....but even then, they treat me so nicely...Val cooked twice for me...shared the salmon that a guy gave her early in the morning for breakfast with me....shared cookies with me and TW....didn't complain (she did...but didn't really ask much then) when I charged her 200 for staying in my room for one and half months, including rent and bills....she is almost literally not at home all the time....now on europe tour for 2 weeks + was in scotland for a week. 3 weeks altogether. I feel really bad charging her extra 50 for not having her in the room.

She also took me to Yo sushi(her workplace) to eat for free! Because she work there mar...

Sigh...

Her things has been shipped back to Msia so the room is pretty empty at the moment.

My things are all hidden away..haha...so ahem...I will take another photo of my room soon...there are some more changes with my room as in the movement of new furniture...having a new table in the room...moving the shoe rack away....I like the drawers to be situated under the mirror...strategic. I guessed all the furniture are placed rather strategically and is convenient indeed.

I feel bad that I have not treated Val nice enuf in my opinion. I am ahem...rather cold...lols....and also complain quite a lot about other things...but there are also nights where we shared things with each other. I guessed after quite some time, she picked up some of my character, as in she asked for my permission before using my things and she made a 'wonderful' (as in she has begun to understand my character) comment when she wanted to borrow the 'qi1 feng1 you2' from me ''I know u want to use it for 5 years, so I won't borrow it from you to bring to Europe.'' Later, she found her own qi1 feng1 you2 in her bag....lols...then why did she wanted to borrow from me earlier?

Lately, for some reason, I have became very calculative once again...I dunno what have gotten into me but I suan4 so much...lols....people asked for paracetamol, I gave them one only...
I hardly eat medicine...in fact, I didn't eat any medicine at all for the past one year...other than one antihistamine becuz of ahem....hahaha...Anyway, looking at my panadol, gonna expire soon too...haha...2008...still far...but I have loads left....keep my liver healthy..hehe..dun eat medicine.

and also...I have became slightly niao1 ji1 also...lols....Eg, Jiyi asked me if I can lend her an umbrella cuz it was raining. I said I only have one (a lie) and she said she will return me later when she comes back from Morrisons. However, when she went into my room, she found a black umbrella (*slapped forehead*...accidentally forgot to hide it away) and said she will take the black one instead of the green one. She thought it was Val's umbrella.
I said it is mine...

she went 'huh..I thought u said u had only one umbrella'.....

'errrr....sorry...I used the black umbrella for hiding from the sun and the green one when it rains.'

That is a half lie and half not....lols...not a lie cuz the black umbrella is small and cannot really hide my whole torso from the rain....hahah...
a lie becuz I only use the black one even though it is small...small but convenient.

The green one is just slightly bigger but still convenient except that I feel that it doesn't effectively hide me from the sun....lols....

U know it's hot lately....31-33 degrees...except that for the past two days, it had been raining. I woke up briefly this morning becuz of a thunderstorm...so scary...haha...

TW has been behaving very VERY funny these few days.
He has been ignoring me..ahem...not only me...Ken and serene....
We called him to play dai tee(card game), he dun want.
He ate Flames today...tsk tsk...not healthy...truthfully, very fattening esp for the coronary arteries.
He went to cell alone without telling us (me, Ken n Serene). He was persuading me to go for fifteen minutes...haha...then gave up and went back to his room. Ken and serene were there and were wondering whether we shud go or not. TW told us that he didn't want to go to cell. However, he disappeared silently. Ken later went to his room and found him missing...and realised that he went to cell alone...wahman...so in the end, we all went to cell.

I wonder how can he stay in his room 24/7....never go out...seldom cook (so seldom that sometimes I wonder if he knows how to cook...) Haha...shud have seen him slaughter the chicken...so gentle...LOLS...and took such a LONG TIME (one hour) to cut up the whole chicken...he wanted to de-skin it first which I have no idea why.

He has funny habits which Ken, Ser and I are pretty frustrated about. Our personalities and characters totally don't fit.
At least I can mix pretty well with Mel, Ken and Ser. But with TW, it is quite a struggle to understand him sometimes.

Hmm..and also...I am very angry about something. I went to the kitchen just now and found that someone has used my Tefal pan without washing it!!!!! I am very particular about cleanliness (no idea when have I transformed to become like this...guessed after I worked as a cleaner)...I saw my pan hanging at the usual place....had no further thoughts...I thought it was clean.
Then, I wanted to fry my tomatoes...took my pan....AND LOLS....the handle and the bottom back of the pan was so SO OILY....literally the whole pan was oily!!!

'okay...the back part is oily...maybe the person forgot to wash the back and hang it on the hook...the front part should be washed.' I thought to myself.

Turned to the front....OMGOMGOMG....so oily!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Obviously someone has not washed the pan AT ALL and hung it on the hook. WHo on earth is this ridiculous person. Ahem...Mel knows my character...he looks after my things if he uses them...then it is his gf who is notorious of being dirty.

GGRRRRR...

Enuf is enuf.... I need my Tefal pan long term....no way I am going to hang my pan or leave my plates on the dishholder anymore. Actually I gave a warning before...not really a warning...but a 'instruction'....
I told Mel that if he uses my rice-cooker, he have to dry it etc before he switches it on.
Anyway, they dun use my rice-cooker anymore cuz too many 'rules and regulations'....haha...they are using YungKit's rice cooker.
But I did 'instruct' them that my things have to last for long time, so use them properly.

Since the rule wasn't obeyed.

I collected every single thing in the kitchen which belonged to me and put them away, as in in drawers and all where people DEFINITELY will not be able to use them. Took my rice-cooker upstairs. Cleared everything away. I know Mel and his gf will be kinda shocked when they cook tmr cuz I know that they have been using my plates (but so far, my plates were properly taken care of)...just that I was very VERY disappointed at how my pan was looked after. It may be TW who did it but I dun think so cuz I dun think he ate dinner....

Hmmm....

ANyway, whoever fault it is, I am not going to display my things in public area anymore...

SIgh....

Maybe that explains why I have became rather selfish these few days. In fact, very selfish.

SIgh...

It's just me...I do not like people to use my things without my permission. They would just have to respect me in that area. Not that I do not lend people things, they have to get my permission and normally followed by instructions on how to use it properly.
Very particular about people breaking or destroying my things.

O Lord, You search me..
You know my ways,
even when I fail You,
I know You love me,

Your holy presence,
Surrounded me.
In every season,
I know You love me,
I know You love me.

At the cross I bow my knees,
where your blood was shed for me,
there is no greater love than this.
You have overcome the grave,
Glory fills the highest place,
what can separate me now.

You go before me,
You shield my way.
Your hand upon me,
I know You love me.

And when the earth fades,
Falls from my eyes.
You stepped before me,
I know You love me....


sleepy...

signing off...
2.40am

blogging

lately I have been to lazy to update my blog. Even before my dad told me that he has been reading my blog all these while, I have been blogging less frequently.I think daddy knows all my blogs url using my laptop IP or something like that...hahhaa....dunno...but I guessed so....Lols...Have been addicted to drawing lately. Drawing anatomy diagrams and sticking on housemate's doors. Actually it started with a picture of a skull. I labelled it as TW's skull and then sticked it on his door. I thought he will crush it and throw it away. But surprisingly he didn't. He left it hanging on the door till today and probably until he leaves. He also told Ken that the pic very nice...lols...so that kind of 'inspired' me to draw more....so now...hahah...almost every part of the body is on his door.....

HAHAHA....

Today went to Manchester as a cell. Wee Leon drove us there...hehe...we walked around the city centre. A lot of sales. I bought my sandals at Clarks for 15 pounds. Soft leather. In the end bought the leather cream also...lols...she said can keep the leather soft always.The boots I bought at clarks last time was good. I have been using it even though it is summer...lols...but getting too hot lately + the sandals that Janice gave me when she came to UK was not good. The bottom of the sandals was so hard that it crack my feet + the sandals keep slipping off my feet + the sides of the shoe is hard + the bottom is falling off..So now...haha...the bottom is soft leather....should last long I hope. Looks pretty strong too..heh...The boots is still alive...haha...hope it will be alive for a long time...That's all I bought in Manchester...haha..The 'graduation photos' in my blog...lols...the graduation clothes is Valerie's one....she wanted to return them to the uni so I quickly borrowed it from her and took a few pictures with it...ahaha...

Oh ya...yesterday the paid volunteer thingy...Lolss...as if my partner and I are superstars...haha....when we went up to present, the china representatives keep taking photos of us...make me slightly panic only..lols...The medical school gave them scoresheets to mark MY presentation and pretend as if they are examiners...sighh..Total mark for an OSCE station is 30. The highest mark that was given was 25. The lowest was 18. Lols....below 16 is fail. They also gave grades. 5 gave me C, 12 gave me B. Phew..Heard the dean said..." you are all very nice examiners"....haha...That was the first time the dean touched me n talked to me...*blush*...it's a her....and her grip is quite firm....haha....forgot to mentioned that the presentation was ok...if it was not becuz I was quite nervous and my 'chinese grammar' went a bit haywire at the end of the presentation...but guessed overall it was ok...just that it's not that up to the standard that some of the chinese 'examiners' wanted...haha

I left a tag in Andrew Lee's blogspot. Someone from CHC....Dunno who...but I just left a tag in his chatterbox. I was quite surprised that such a message can inspire a person so much....heh.....he blogged about it in his entry somemore....shows how much he appreciated it I guessed...

Anyway..

signing off..

7pm.

hehe

"I was really encouraged by the tag made by Steph earlier on....

I may not know who you are, but certainly, that one statement touched me in a way and changed my day completely...."

Andrew Lee...

My old blog has been updated...go read..haha

thoughts and songs

I make a vow
My life will always honour you
Whether I live or die
I belong to Him
He bore my sin
I owe this life to my saving King

Hallelujah,
I am not my own
You are in control
Hallelujah

For me to live is christ
And to die is gain
No matter what price i pay
I choose to give this life away
Only by the cross I am saved

Hillsong new album: mighty to God.
Song: at the cross.
One of the songs I love most.
Hear...It's so hard to be able to hear the latest album's song esp the WHOLE song on the net...


http://wetheinseparable.blogspot.com/2005_06_01_wetheinseparable_archive.html


signing off...
btw I still update my old blog

sien2

A short post continuing from yesterday...haha...Was ended quite abruptly becuz I wanted to cook.

Just to avoid misunderstanding and people from being overly cautious when talking to me..hehe...I only get VERY annoyed when I am blamed for something which is half my fault and half not my fault. For eg the bike pedal that came off Kyle's bike. It fell off becuz of the bike was not used for exceptionally long time and so things has rusted and degraded. So it fell off soon after I rode the bike. I would say that it's mostly the bike's fault but also my fault becuz if I have not ridden it, the pedal would not have loosen.
The bikes in my house are not that lousy...lol...the pedal don't fall off just like that...lols....so I reckon it's the bike's fault...
and so...when Kyle went...that I CAUSED the pedal to fall off WHEN I RODE it, I get VERY annoyed...

Also, I don't like it when I have said that I do not want to play, but still the person keeps forcing me to do the things that I do not like to do. For eg, yesterday, Kyle was forcing me to play online scrabble with him. He sent me the link before a week ago. The game require me to sign up and said that they will send me an activation code. I waited for the code to arrive in my mailbox but nothing came. This time, Kyle bugged me to play again...lols...I told him that it is so troublesome but he insisted...so sien...so I went to sign up again.. and the same thing happened...I was VERY annoyed and infuriated....(maybe becuz the sun is really annoying...shone straight on my face...)...so I didn't reply Kyle anymore and he went offline...

sien...

Anyway, I also very sien with the paid volunteer thingy. This friday my partner and I have to re-enact an OSCE scene in Mandarin. The person-in-charge only informed me this morning that there is a meeting...LOLSSS...and said that he preferred me to come...grrr...why not informed me earlier...mafan...+ I dunno how much pay I will get for all the trouble + this 5 min acting will get....

sien la..

anyway,

signing off..
11am

annoyed

I am so so annoyed...

Kyle always make me annoyed for some reason...sigh....

He likes to exaggerate at times, though more trustworthy compared to Marc.

Also he likes to boast which makes me utterly annoyed...I dislike people who makes false promises + boast...

He said something like going bowling tonight and that he is going to catch the train tonight to come over to leeds...LOLS....I told him that I cannot...I have something on..which is true and not true...lol...tonight may have dinner at WL's place...
Then he said...he forgot that he has a dinner with his dad. LOLS....so say if I agreed, he is going to fly my aeroplane.

He is not certain at times which makes me annoyed...

Then he said he wants to watch superman with me tomoro. I said can also...

But at the end of the comversation, he says :''see me on wednesday''...cuz he said he wants to go bike riding with me in Hyde Park this wednesday. Hmm...I dunno if this promise can be fulfilled or not...lols..

Talking about annoyed...

Let me reflect last thursday's BBQ...

When I wanted to borrow the bike from Alberto (kor's friend), kor went telling Alberto..:''U sure u want to lend her..' and kor said something like the bike may fall apart...
something like that....

I was also rather annoyed...but thank God kor changed the topic...God knows how much I want to ride a bike for so so long....and when the chance came, kor said that...and it nearly made me not able to ride it becuz Alberto may feel apprehensive after hearing that and won't let me ride anymore.

But kor was 'let off' when he said "I thought U wanted to ride the bike" after a short while of silence...

But undoubtly was annoyed for a slight moment....but the annoyment was not as bad as what Kyle said after I rode the bike.

When I was apologising to Alberto becuz I wasn't sure whether I spoilt the bike or not, Kyle said :''Do you know that she made the pedal on my bike fall off??'' etc...he said some more things which I can hardly remember.

I would say that I was SUPER annoyed at that statement...I HATE people bringing up the past for some reason....if were to HUMILIATE me....

I was undoubtly angered at that statement. I have felt bad making the pedal fall off...and hey...it's not really my fault k....blame that the bike has not been ridden for a long time and the screw disintegrated...so what has that got to do with me??? Just that when I rode Kyle's bike, I was so unlucky to experience 'breaking' someone's bike not by my own fault...

That's just me...dislike my past being brought up ESP WHEN I FEEL BAD about it....if the past is brought up, it has to be done by me...by my own will and 'permission'...lols...

Anyway...

enuf of complaining..lols...just that I am feeling annoyed by many things right now...lols...

signing off..
5pm

my mundane life...haha

I still update my old blog once a while, just that this blog is more of a heartfelt blog...hahahha...wrong vocab...don't care...

Yesterday, went to church. Paul was the worship leader. He called TW up to do the actions for 'I have got heaven on the inside of me'. TW was not that good...lol...it was only then Andrew's presence was sorely missed....Church seems to be slightly quieter without Andrew around. Even if I want to jump during worship, I felt slightly awkward. Sigh...

A topic on different personalities was brought up by kor. Talking about different personalities, my parents' personalities are 80% different too...And it was the personalities that makes them special...as in my dad is not organised, but my mum is... so it is always my mum who has a schedule with us...for eg, cleaning the house...always my mum who 'order' us to do the cleaning....it's my dad who ask us to cook...

My dad is quite a spendthrift but my mum is not...so my mum controls all the money and so we can have today (education)...My dad said:''without my mum, we will have 3 mercedes, a one million worth house with empty pockets and dunno what to do with the 6 of us."....so without their different characters, our house would have been a disaster too....

Just that the only thing I used to see as a conflict is spiritual wise....my dad is devoted but my mum is not very....so if my dad goes to church too often, my mum will complain....but my dad will tolerate everything my mum said.

My mum said before, everybody has their own strong points and weaknesses. It's just whether we can tolerate each other's weaknesses or not....if cannot, then don't think of having a relationship with that person. Every individual have their own differences....can u find a perfect couple with similar personalities? Very few I have seen....not that it is not possible...

I am not saying that I want to enter a relationship. I feel that I am still young (though not really...coming to 21 soon) and not that very mature enuf to handle one...plus I still want to observe for a few more years to see how everything goes. Who knows the guy that God has destined for me is not in the early future but later...so I would rather wait for God to show me the right one.

Haha....have been pretty bored down with things...till I blog these kinda stuff..

Yesterday played football again. TW hurt his toe...his nail broke *ouch*...and the blood kept coming....quite scary...hehe...so I lent him my antiseptic cream...

Valerie had a friend over for 3 nights. Last night was the first night and already I am not that very happy because it was quite squashy...My pillow and blacket fell on the floor 5 times....sien....I woke up so many times in the middle of the night, with my hand automatically reaching out in the darkness below the bed with my eyes shut...grab anything soft lying on the floor and continued sleeping....

sigh....

Today, my supervisor said tat I am a good girl again....hehe...she thought that I only mopped the hallway from the 11th floor till ground floor...but I also mopped the stairs all the way from the 10th floor to ground floor (so lazy...missed the flight of stairs from the 11th to the 10th...haha)...so I told her I did the front stairs too and her scornful look changed into a smile instantly...lolss...

went to Chin Tuan's BBQ on saturday night. I fell in love with sea bass(A FISH....not a human...haha)....so yummy...Chin said a sea bass is 5.50pounds ....
Expensive but worth the money...because the fish is so so so so so yummy...anything that is yummy is worth my money...haha....How much I love food...not just food, but GOOD and NICE food....hehe...:)

nothing more to say..haha..

signing off...
11.20am...

sien..

sigh...

Why am I always offending people?? THis week two liao...WL and TW...

sien..

Once again, I skipped cell...dunno why...but just am not in the mood in going. I didn't really missed on purpose also...slept at 4pm after I made TW pissed off...then by the time I woke up, it was already 7pm...I feared that I cannot make it in time for the ice-breaker so I asked Jean to help me do...gave her the idea that William gave me.

Sigh..

After that, I was so lazy to go to cell liao...dunno why...I am always slacking...I can escape church and cell for a period as long as 3 months as I did when I was in KL. Lolss....and now I am already in that 'mode'...lazy to go to church and cell unless I have been trusted with some responsibilities.

Supposed to go to Blackpool tmr..but Kyle so blur...he told me last time that he has tickets for free entrance to Blackpool theme park. However, today, he told me tat the ticket has expired and asked me if I could pay for my own entrance fee..but I am not in the mood to go anywhere tmr + am really stressed + dun feel like spending too much money this week. So, told Kyle I didn't want to go anymore...am really not in the mood to do anything..not in the mood becuz of 2 things:
1) kor has just left for good unless he comes back one day...for some purpose..be it hols or further studies???
2)I had just offended TW..and both of us staying under the same roof will gonna make things difficult...I really didn't mean to tell William about it...just that...sigh...

THinking of kor's presence in Leeds can kinda make me sad...well, maybe the reason for not feeling anything much for the past 2 weeks was probably because I am trying very hard not to think of the memories kor has left behind. But today, Kyle reminded me of the rabbit that we microwaved..it was so funny...Laughed for a while after I reminiscence but turned quickly into sorrow...realising that all these left behind are just going to be memories and that he has left Leeds....sigh..make me cry only...

I am feeling pretty stressed about many things though...time flies...one shot I am left with 2 months of hols before the new hectic term starts...sigh..
stressed because I dunno how to tell TW later how sorry I am...he is so pissed off...I am so stress also that I have made someone mad. He has been ignoring ever since... Well, I dun really care anyway...I can cope on my own just that I have no one to share to anymore other than Valerie.

I dun really know Val last time..but since she stayed here, I have kinda got to know her better. She is pretty nice and friendly...also shared quite a lot of things with me in my room...as time flies, she gets better...I mean we get along a lot better liao...

I find it amazin tat my dad is able to find my previous blog and has been reading ever since...I cannot imagine....all the naughty entries that I have wrote...my parents read it all and yet I was left in the dark...sigh..It was pretty good that they managed to hide the secret that they are reading my blog away for so long...I wouldn't have known about it if it wasn't because of my sis who told me...I would still continue to write naughty entries.

My dad read my blog and made a few comments about the similarities we had..

His comment was:
1) very generous
2) heart is too soft
3) Don't know how to save money
4) Buy a lot of things.
5) Like to eat nice food.
6) Adventurous
7) Mix well with anyone
8) trusting
9)Don't know how to say 'no'
10) emotional
11) my dad was very sensitive when he was young and cry easily.

I have to admit that I am an overly sensitive person n how I hate myself for that.
I think too much...always and will never change unless God changes me.
A small matter can be magnified in great amounts all because I think too much.

Sigh..

I am tired and frustrated.

You know what happened this morning...

I woke up at 6am and forgot that work starts at 7.15am and not 6am... + I read the clock wrongly...woke up...switched off the alarm clocks before they disturb Val's sleep. Then, looking at the clock after doing some stuff, I was shocked and rather lolsss when I realised that I have woke up one hour earlier...

I on the radio alarm clock and went back to sleep.

OMG...Who knows, I heard the clock ring at 7am, off it and went back to lie down for a moment which instantly turned into a 40 minutes nap...
Woke up and found that it is 7.35am!! Immediately, I rushed to work..lucky my supervisor didn't scold me...

I guessed I have been lacking sleep for the past 5 days...slept for an average of 4.5 hours a day all because I have been talking to TW every night...from now onwards, since I have made TW mad, I guessed I can afford to sleep earlier liao...11pm as usual...since we have nothing to say to each other anymore.

sien...

Feel like skipping church this sunday....but I need the new hillsong album songs..

signing off,
11.20pm.
sien....how am I going to tell TW how sorry I am? It's so hard to explain to him in words...and may end up sayin the wrong things...bastard...